Thursday, March 13, 2014
My *Real* Family
"DNA neither cares nor knows. DNA just is. And we dance to it's music." --- Richard Dawkins
Though his first two statements are fact, I disagree with the third. Personally, I choose to compose my own damn music. :)
A lot of emphasis is made of biological connections now. Perhaps it is because we have developed the science behind it. Maybe our society is just addicted to the Maury Povich "Who's My Baby's Daddy" reruns. I can't be sure of the origin of the fascination, but as with music, I prefer to compose my own family too.
Yes, yes, I hear you all shouting it at me, and you are correct.....I am a control freak. :)
DNA or biology, though important, is not sufficient. I am biologically related to all kinds of people, and care very little about them. And then there are the vital human beings in my life, with whom I do not share one single strand of DNA.
DNA can be manufactured. I see it every day at work. All that is required is a petri dish and a creative, intelligent human being with a strong science background and voila.....petri people.
Love, on the other hand, can not be manufactured, altered, duplicated. It is emotional versus physical and a *far* more binding connection.
There are key people in my life that I love more than my life itself. People I would do absolutely anything for. People who I know without hesitation would be there for me at any time, through anything.....day or night......and vice versa. People I would protect even at the expense of my own safety or mortality. This is my 'family.'
Aside from my children and a couple siblings, I have little to do with the bulk of my biological family. The vast majority of this by design; and in some cases by death, but mostly this is a conscious choice.
I have 'sisters' who I adore that came into my life from completely separate sperm sources.
I have Suzi (my mama) who stumbled upon me here, saw herself in me and was brave enough to stick around for the ride. :)
I have my Daddy, my Dom who found me as we both sought a new spanko partner, and chose to keep me, love me and re-raise me.
None of these people have a biological connection with me.......what we have is far stronger than that. We have true unconditional love, palpable emotion, unwavering support, understanding, friendship, deep caring, connection and again......L-O-V-E.
Control freak? Possibly.....okay, okay, absolutely without the shadow of a doubt.
But I quite like this control.....for everything I was born without by the curse of biology, I have found now. Choosing my family is leaps and bounds better than simply being 'stuck' with people via DNA.