Resolutions

12/30/2014


The new year is right around the corner.......and many of us are contemplating our resolutions. My thoughts.......

I resolve to be a good girl.

I resolve to be more respectful.

I resolve to always be obedient.

Hmmm.....the resolutions are similar each year.....and though I will work my hardest to inch closer to the ever-perfect, ideal, dream submissive for my Daddy Dom.....I predict plenty of these sorts of moments in my 2015! 

All I Want For Christmas

12/16/2014


All I want for Christmas is a spanking. :) Okay, okay.....and maybe this paddle too!

The entire holiday season ambushed me this year and to be quite honest, the stress of it all was the last thing I needed in my life.

I am, of course, still cooperatively waltzing through the season and doing all the typical stuff I need to do for everyone else.....but what I wouldn't give to just run away from it all.....even if only for a few hours.....and spend some quality time OTK with my favorite man over 4 foot tall.

One Of Those Days

12/15/2014


Some days, I would be far better off if I hadn't even gotten out of bed at all.

**Sighs**

Today is one of those days! Hmph!

With Me...Always

12/10/2014


Found this today.

Absolutely love it.

So very accurate....if you have this depth of connection and intimacy in your D/s relationship. I truly adore it.

Obviously I love to physically have my Dom beside me, but the reality of our relationship is there are many, many days when he is not.

And yet...

I can feel him with me, always.

Guiding me. Watching me. Protecting me. Teaching me. Loving me.

It is an amazing feeling to have an almost telepathic connection with another person. To know in my heart that regardless of where I am, He is always with me.

I Am An Elf

12/07/2014


Only 18 more days until Christmas.

Now I have a dilemma.

I can not for the life of me decide which naughty lil elf costume I should purchase for this years holiday attire.

Sooo many choices........

Nice even mix of red and green. Bare legs are always hot. And the apron definitely makes it look like I work um, er.....building toys.  ;)

Now this one is practically all green, with a few red accents. I imagine it would look amazing with my red hair and green eyes. The tights are cute and candy cane-esque. Bare shoulders but lovely, silky half sleeve gloves. Loving this one.

Then there is this Santa inspired, all red one. Velvet and I love the bows. Red fishnets and black stilettos would certainly compliment this look and I happen to have both in my wardrobe. :)

Now.....which ensemble shall I choose??? They are all absolutely perfect. Ughh....what's a girl to do?

Now, before any of you say it, I am certain any of these darling little outfits will help propel me onto this year's Naughty List.......but if you remember back to my Thanksgiving post, that is, in fact, my goal this year! :)  This spank-horny lil elf needs spanked. Naughty List, here I come.

And besides, who ever heard of a "nice elf"? It is an impossibility. Venture back to grade school vocabulary for a moment people.......ELF is synonymous with: pixie, sprite, fairy, brownie, puck.....and my personal favorite.....IMP!

We are naughty, lively, small creatures with magical powers and a mischievous nature! So....technically speaking....I am bound by definition to misbehave! And besides.....everyone loves a naughty lil elf.......dressed like a festive hooker. LOL!

All You Need

11/29/2014


Ughh.....yes, yes, yes.

I can absolutely relate.

It has been far too long since I have been with my Daddy.

I need him.

Not Feeling It Yet

11/26/2014


Tomorrow is Thanksgiving.

Ready or not.....the holidays are here and there is nothing we can do about it.

**Sighs**

Personally, I am not at all ready for this season. I typically love the holidays but I just am not quite feeling it yet this year. I feel rushed trying to get everything together. I feel down right exhausted when I think of the typical familial stress & chaos that the season brings. I'm just ughhh.

Tomorrow when I am cooking, cleaning, hosting, and playing waitstaff for this scene to occur:

My physical body will be present and engaged, but my mind will drift off, likely to a scene similar to this one:

Because, let's be honest, there is a blizzard outside and right now I am pretty damn jealous that this turkey is the only one being roasted tomorrow! Hmph!

On the bright side, though the Thanksgiving holiday snuck up on me......there is still ample time to end up on Santa's Naughty List this year!  :)

Happy Thanksgiving, ladies & gentlemen! I hope you all have a wonderful holiday!

Offensive?

11/23/2014


An accurate definition.

Submissive: One who finds empowerment through yielding to another.

Why, perhaps, do you think so many vanilla souls are offended by this label? Or the kink as a whole? Why should it bother anyone else what we choose to do in our personal relationships?

Every day when I log into my email & blog, I have numerous messages from strangers, lurkers and admirers alike. One message theme has stayed consistent throughout time......"your life offends me."

Huh? Really?

I must have missed the day that this blog became required or mandated reading in the lives of the rest of the planet.

Many things offend people, though I believe for the most part that our indignant society is trained to be offended far more often than is required by morals or ethics. I, personally, am offended often by Republican banter, Giants fans, and the mistreatment of children & animals. Rarely does a strangers' words, ideas or life offend me.

I'm not at all sure why my kink would offend someone is say.....Berlin......who does not know me personally, never will and is not forced to see, hear or read about my life. Good lord the threshold for offensive material has dropped dramatically.

If you personally do not want to have your ass spanked......then don't do it. If you don't wish to discover the yummy world of D/s.......then don't do it. If you're so offended by my life that you feel compelled to write to me.......DON'T DO IT.......and perhaps find a hobby.

Unless or until I am fucking livestock in Times Square while dressed as the Pope as school children watch........my life should not offend you! Grow up!

I Am Here. Always

11/19/2014


I am here.

I have never left.

I never will.

I understand that you need space right now; but please don't forget that I am*your* girl and it is okay for you to lean on me occasionally too. I don't mind, I swear I don't.

You have always been there for me when I needed you; it's more than okay to let me repay that kindness, Sir.

I struggled today. A lot.

I can count on one hand the number of days like this that we have had in our 3 year relationship.......and still have extra fingers. Perhaps its rarity is what makes it so difficult. I always have constant access to you and speak with you every single day (perhaps I am a bit spoiled...not that I am complaining) so when these days arise and I get the "I'm not ok. I need space now." message.......I have to fight an internal conflict. I want to respect your request/demand for time & space.......but on the other hand I know it means you are *not* okay and I want to rush to you as quickly as possible to "fix it."

Ever the obedient girl, I have always opted for selection #1 and simply waited patiently for your return to me. And again today, this is what I have done.

Daddy I know there is a lot going on right now. Several stressors. Frustration teetering toward insanity. Some we can control, others we can not.......it is with the latter that we apply The Serenity Prayer (or so my wonderful father has told me).

I understand I am not the cause of the issues that have you at the brink today, but I feel in small ways like I contributed to the frustration. I'm sorry.

Nothing in this world that affects you does *not* affect me. You are mine, and I, yours. I love you more than words could ever hope to express and I hate to see you upset. I know men don't "vent".......but if you wanted to, I would listen. I know Doms don't cry.......but if you wanted to, I have a shoulder. If you simply need an outlet for your frustration at the circumstances.......I will volunteer for a "just because I'm pissed at the world" beating.

I am here, Sir. When you are ready, I am here. I've never left. I never will. I love you.

Let Me Count the Reasons

 

11/09/2014


What is it about this man that ensures his complete domination over me and my absolute submission to him?

What is it about him that drives me so wild?

So many, many possibilities.......

Maybe it is his penetrating chocolate brown eyes? They are mesmerizing to me. I could look up into them all day long. They can be intriguing and terrifying at the very same time. Mmmm.......possibility #1

Or perhaps it is his dominant jaw? This was one of the first physical attributes to pop out at me when we met in person. My Dom has a very masculine jaw line that I absolutely adore. Even when I make him clench it, I'm pretty certain I still love it. :)  Yep......definitely a strong possibility in #2.

What about the way he scolds me? The man has mastered the art form of the lecture. Nothing can instantaneously scare off my outspoken, independent, confident 'big girl' and render me a pouting, nervous 'little girl' as quickly as his scolding. Mmmm....option #3 is also a strong contender.

Oooh but then there are his hands. Mmm. The large, powerful, unforgiving "spanker's paws" that rapidly pepper my bare upturned bottom and thighs relentlessly. And the strong yet tender hands that gently massage and knead my punished skin, or softly tussles my flowing red hair as I kneel before him. Option #4......ahh bliss.

His belt! Though for some sub girls, not a likely possible favorite.....I am a pain slut and I definitely love my Daddy's whipping belt. Occasionally I love to hate it. But I love it none the less. The sounds it makes, the way it looks dangling from his hand, the smell......#5 is definitely a viable option.

Perhaps it is his creative sadist with which I am in love? The man certainly dominates the mind fuck. Whether he is coming up with a dreadful long distance punishment for his naughty girl or crafting new viscous implements of bottom destruction.....he is a very talented man. #6 is a formidable foe in this race.

What about the way he takes me in hand and punishes me when I am naughty? Mmmm.....nothing makes me more anxious and giddy than a pending punishment session. The man is overwhelmingly dominant and he knows what makes me tick (and squeal). Ouch and Yum.....#7 might be pulling ahead in this little competition.

Oooh then again maybe it is his arms and the way he holds me? Whether it is a simple greeting hug or his cradling my shaking body in his lap as I cry after I've been soundly spanked.......there is not a place in this world where I feel more loved, safe, little and cherished than in my Daddy's strong arms. Ahh.....#8 might have just moved into first place.


Actually, each of the 8 possibilities are absolutely reasons that I fell for this man and continue to adore him more each day. They are all part of the man that I love, respect and offer my absolute submission to. I don't think I could go without any of the above for very long or I would be a very unhappy little girl. I have always been very hesitant to admit to myself, or anyone else, that I *need* another person.....but I can confidently say that I do definitely *need* my Dom and the relationship we have built with one another over the last 3 years.

I am an incredibly lucky girl to have found my Daddy Dom. He is so much more than my kink partner. He is my best friend, my moral compass, my sounding board, my confidante, my anchor in life. There is nothing in this world I would not do to please this man. And though every entry on the above list contributes to the depth of my emotion and addiction to this amazing man........what I love the most about him has not yet been listed.  :) 

It is....................

His amazing mind.

My Daddy Dom is easily one of the most intelligent human beings I have ever met. He is both highly educated and seasoned by life experience. I have yet to have an issue that he has been unable to help me with. If I have a question, whether it is technical or practical.....he has an answer, or will find one for me because I am his girl and I am a priority for him. :)

I spent time in the infancy of our D/s relationship observing him in his professional life and that garnered a great deal of the respect that I initially had for him. Obviously as we grew closer to one another, I had many more reasons to respect this man. But it was critical for me in the beginning to be able to have an intelligent, meaningful conversation with my Dom.......if he was nothing more than a monotone, dense, robo-spanker then my interest would have waned.

Dominance and submission is as much psychological as it is physical.....actually more so. It was my Daddy's amazingly complex, sexy and sadistic mind that first drew me to him. He had to be compatible to me on an intellectual level. The physicality was just the icing on my kinky little cake. :) His mind is what drew me in...

Like a moth to the flame.

And here I remain......routinely getting scorched.  :)

It Hurts

11/02/2014


Mmm....

Definitely in one of *these* spank horny moods.

Oh what I wouldn't give to be helplessly upended across my Daddy Dom's capable lap as he peppered my bare bottom and thighs with his huge, powerful paw.

Mmm....yep yep....count this girl in.  :)

Unfortunately, for me and my spank horny lil bottom, my Daddy is traveling for work the first half of this week. He leaves early tomorrow morning, in fact. Just the thought makes me pout.

What is it about geographical distance? Even though this is work, not vacation, meaning I will have unrestricted access to him any moment I wish and I can entertain him all night in his hotel at the end of his day....I still get all whiny and melancholy when I know he is leaving.

I will contemplate naughtiness to attract his disciplinary attention...even though I won't really be lacking it.

I will feel an odd sort of disconnect; as if there were an ocean separating me from the man I love, adore and proudly belong to...even though he won't even be in another time zone.

Ughh. Such is the life of a spoiled rotten, spank horny, lil daddy's girl. Hmph!

I suppose I shall look forward to his return and make plans to land myself over his waiting knee as soon as possible!

Exactly What This Naughty Girl Did

 

10/19/2014

 

 

And that is exactly what this naughty little girl did.

 

 

I've been out of sorts lately. Stressed. Angry without a credible target, per se. I saw my Daddy for a punishment session just 2 weeks ago but my mood has sucked since 4 days after that spanking and I just needed another. Daddy discovered a few things he decided I deserved to be punished for, I disagreed. I simply wanted an intense "just because" spanking.

 

 

We arranged to get together this past Friday and my wonderful Daddy even gave me the option to choose: be spanked just because or be spanked for the new offenses he added to my Punishment List. He knew the answer before asking the question; I truly believe he just wanted to hear me say it since he had given me several days to contemplate my predicament.

 

 

I *wanted* a "just because" spanking, but I *needed* and *deserved* a punishment spanking. I'm not the kind of girl to avoid consequences, whether or not I agree with them, within my D/s relationship. He knew, given the option to choose, I would ask to be punished so there were no unresolved issues between the two of us.

 

 

And that is exactly what this naughty little girl did.

 

 

I stood quietly in the corner, lost deep in thought, contemplating whether or not I truly felt this punishment was warranted. And before even the first of many, many harsh swats found their mark...I agreed with my Daddy that I did in deed deserve to be punished. I apologized for my misbehavior and I asked him to punish me. He held my glance for several moments, searching my eyes for sincerity and his handsome face softened into a smile momentarily. He was proud of his little girl. Not long after, his jaw tightened, his eyes darkened and he went back to focusing on the task at hand...punishing his errant little girl.

 

 

It may not have been the spanking I initially wanted but it absolutely was the spanking that I needed and the spanking that I deserved. And at the end of the day, as I drifted off to the first restful sleep in days, I slowly traced my fingertips across my fresh welts and smiled...this man rocks my world.

 

 

 

 

So Much for Being a Good Girl

10/12/2014


I do, in deed, need to be spanked. In fact, I alluded to that point just days ago in my blog post "Again. Hard. Again."

Perhaps my Daddy Dom is lurking on my blog?

Perhaps a spanko birdie whispered it into his ear?

Perhaps he just knows his little girl so well that his Dom-radar started squealing in high-pitched tones alerting him to this building need?

HOWEVER.........

I believe I made it perfectly, crystal clear in that entry that I need spanked for a number of very specific reasons! Those being: stress, time with Him and simply because it is a part of who I am and what I need to keep me balanced and happy.

I also incredibly clearly noted that I had *not* been naughty! I had not crossed any lines! I had not added any new offenses to my spotlessly clean Punishment List! I had not pushed any boundaries!

I, this evening, was told that I am going to be getting the spanking I so desperately need.......BUT it is NOT the spanking I want! Hmph!

During casual conversation with Daddy tonight via phone, I gave him some detail about something I had done/said a couple weeks back. I could quite literally hear his blood pressure sky-rocket. I knew immediately by the drastic drop in his tone that he was upset with me. His next sentence confirmed it..... "my hands are literally clenched into fists right now."  :( 

I was quiet and listened intently as he chastised my choice, tears slowly trickling down my face. My little heart was breaking; I truly hate when he gets this angry with me. It is rare that my Daddy calls me "stupid."

He mentioned nothing of repercussions and our call ended as positively as it could have, given the content of the discussion. Now, more than 2 hours later, he sends me an instant message to tell me I now have a new entry to add to my Punishment List for what I had done. Just as I begin to softly, respectfully protest this.....he slaps me across the face with: "and a 2nd entry for not telling me prior to now, also a repeat offense!"

I HATE THIS!!!

I tried to explain to him that the basis of this offense is something we covered in it's entirety at my punishment session just last week.....so truthfully, though he didn't yet know of this particular instance, it really has been covered and I really have been soundly spanked for it and I really did learn that lesson and he really does not need to repeat it again.

He doesn't agree.

So now we remain at the sucky impasse of agreeing to disagree.......with the caveat that whether or not I agree, I am still going to get my ass beat for it. Literally.

I haven't even had my nice, clean, empty Punishment List for double digits yet! Seriously, I am at only 8 days since my last punishment. I typically last much longer before soiling it again. And what really infuriates me is I truly *have* been a perfectly behaved good girl since my punishment......this incident happened weeks ago!

It is both frustrating and disheartening to see new offenses added to my list in such a short time following a hard punishment. It makes me feel like a failure.

Makes me question myself (i.e. "will I ever be good enough?").

Immediately impacts my entire outlook on my behavior (i.e. "you're already in trouble again, so no need to work toward good behavior, it's ruined now anyway.").

Makes me want to censor and want to edit. If I hadn't been so god damned honest during a casual conversation, I wouldn't now be in serious trouble.

Ughhh! I could just scream! Not that it would matter much any way, since he decided our conversation was over without even informing me, leaving me alone and upset and talking to my damn self!

So much for being a good girl.  :( 

His Touch

 

10/11/2014


Oh how I love his touch.

His hands both administer the pain I crave and deliver me from it.

My Daddy has large, strong, "spanker's hands." They, on their own, can deliver quite a punishing spanking. I, quite clearly, love them when utilized as an implement on my naughty upturned bottom; but it is all of those other little touches that absolutely make me swoon.

When his massive hand encircles my wrist or grasps the nape of my neck.

Mmmm. Takes my breath away every single time.

When he gently tucks loose tendrils of my long, flowing red hair back behind my ears and then scoops it up at the base of my head when he leans in to whisper into my ear.

I love feeling his hands on my body. It always makes my nerve endings come alive as they try to anticipate what kind of touch will follow the last.

The way he cradles me to his chest as I cry after I've been punished.

The way he lovingly runs his powerful hands oh so tenderly over my scorched bottom and thighs.

The way he softly brushes the tear drops from my cheeks.

The way he envelops me in an embrace and holds me tight to him.

They may not always be gentle, tender and soft.......

But they're not always rigid, harsh and unforgiving.

I think I have the perfect, delicate balance between the two.......

And at the end of the day, I always know my Daddy loves me.

Again. Hard. Again.

10/07/2014


In the grand scheme of things, it really hasn't been that long since I have been spanked. In fact, I was seriously punished just days ago. My bottom and thighs still wear his marks and I am still cautious when sitting down.

And yet....

I need to be spanked. Again. Hard. Again.

I haven't done anything wrong necessarily. I have no new entries on my Punishment List that need addressed. I have no harbored guilt or remorse which seeks an outlet. I have broken no rules. Crossed no lines. Pushed no boundaries.

And yet....

I need to be spanked. Again. Hard. Again.

I'm stressed. My life is still not resting in a 'comfortable normal' pattern. I am overwhelmed. I'm alive but not living. Independent but not free. Content but not happy.

And naturally, aside from the mounting stress for which I seek release, I am quite simply a spanko girl.

This is who I am.

It is as much a part of the fabric of my being as my quick wit, my emerald eyes, my red hair, my stubborn Irish nature.

I also, though I saw him just days ago, miss my Daddy. Our session late last week was the first time I have gotten to spend quality time with him since my birthday back in July. Though we speak every day, nothing quiets and balances me more than being in his presence. His eyes, his silky smooth voice, his touch, his smell, his undivided attention.....bliss.

Perhaps, if our schedules allow, I will have another Daddy daughter date with him in the next couple weeks. I simply need to be with him. To quietly kneel in front of him and gaze up into his chocolate brown eyes. To be draped across his capable lap as he peppers my upturned bottom mercilessly for no reason other than I am his and he can. To bury my face in a pillow while he whips my bare bottom and thighs hard and then bury my tear-streaked face in his chest as he holds me after the last swats find their mark.

I need to be spanked. Again. Hard. Again.

I Got Mine

10/06/2014


I got mine!  :)

Do you have yours?

October is National Kink Month, so make sure you spend lots of time indulging in your fetish, kneeling beside Him, draped OTK, and pushing your limits in your own unique D/s dynamic.

What life would be worth living without passion?

How does your D/s relationship impact your day to day life and overall mood?

Could you even imagine your world now without this special connection? Without his steady presence? Without the release your kink provides?

Ecstasy of Pleasure

09/30/2014

Mmmm.......so very insightful and dead-on accurate.

Love this.

It comes so very close to verbalizing the driving force of my inner masochist.

Yearning

 

 

 

 

09/28/2014


I can absolutely relate to this sentiment. It felt like a hopeless search, a never-ending journey, a pure waste of time when I was searching for my "perfect Dom."

So many prospects.

So many delusional egotistic men.

So many who over-promise and under-deliver.

So many self identifiers who shouldn't have control of a Chihuahua, let alone a human being.

I wondered if perhaps the issue was mine. Maybe I needed too much. Perhaps my expectations were skewed. Maybe I was unrealistic in my pursuit of perfection. Maybe my Dom just didn't exist, anywhere other than my creative spankophile mind.

But then it happened. I stumbled right into Mr. Paddle-My-Bottom-Perfect when I wasn't even actively looking. I was caught off guard and left unbalanced by his entrance into my reality.

His demeanor was intriguing. His dominance absolutely overwhelmed me. His eyes and voice pulled hard at my inner submissive core. His touch melted me, made me swoon, tamed me. It is as if I had dreamed this man into existence. Our needs, our expectations, our desires.......so incredibly complimentary. And he arrived.....exactly what I needed......exactly when I needed him the most. 

When the time is right, your effort will pay off. Never give up and never settle, ladies (and gents).

Little Miss Attitude

09/27/2014

Who me???

You could not possibly assume the title of this post was in any way, shape or form a reference to yours truly!

I am an angelic, demure, passive creature....

With manners and morals and all that other crap.  :)

Oh and a few other vital accessories, such as:

 

Eye rolls.......check!

Dismissive, passive-aggressive gestures.......Check!

 

 

"I can't hear you...la la la la la la la".......Check!

Scrunched up "you are the dumbest person on the planet" expression......Check!

Whiny, pessimistic attitude when told "No".......Check!

Naughty words and gestures.......check!

Sad, little "you don't love me anymore" puppy dog pout.......Check!

Loud, obnoxious, must-have-the-last-word tantrums.......Check!



Now, some of these tactics are utilized regularly and others only on incredibly rare occasions. One might think that I would seek to find alternatives to attempt to get my way since the best indicator of future behavior is past behavior.......and every single time I have utilized any of the aforementioned techniques it has always ended in the same unpleasant way........