Fighting, Semantic Games & Withholding Information

**A regular blog reader asked me if I would post this session in its entirety as just one post. It is a punishment session from back in Sept that I had with Professor for fighting. I originally wrote this as 3 separate posts ("My Daughter Does NOT Fight" #1-#3) because it was so long and complex. Here it is in its entirety, as requested.**

09/19/2012

"So what do you think? You want to plead my case to Professor when he gets here?" I giggled on the phone to Susan. "I can attempt to provide you a defense if you really think it will do you any good." Susan offered before laughing at the idea. 

I was laying on my stomach on the bed as I chatted on speakerphone with my girlfriend to keep myself busy so I wouldn't be overwhelmed with nervousness and panic as I waited for my disciplinarian to arrive for our scheduled punishment session. I laughed at Susan's offer and heard the door slam shut behind me; my stomach sank and my mouth went dry as I slowly started to rise to my feet. 

"Goodbye." Professor said, giving me my cue to end the call. "I have to go Susan. I'll call or email later." I almost whispered as I realized my voice must have decided to get the heck out of dodge. "Bye honey. Good luck." Susan said in her most reassuring tone. I disconnected the call and turned off my phone and brushed past Professor on my way to sit it on the dresser. Sitting the phone down I decided that the mood in the room sucked and I needed to brighten it up. :) I spun around and gave Professor a big smile before speaking, "I'm glad you found the place; I was beginning to worry that you were lost which would kind of suck because I'd miss you lots if you got lost." 

I think my giggling at the start of a punishment session caught him off guard; typically I am quiet, nervous, remorseful. Nope, not today; I figured I'd try my luck with humor. I fumbled with my fingers nervously in front of me and giggled as I watched Professor closely. His eyes met mine and he studied my giggling face for a minute or two before smiling himself at my giddy nonsense. I love seeing him smile. 

After a minute more, Professor picked up the copy of my Punishment List off of the desk and began to thumb his way through it, occasionally peering up at me over the top of the page. As I stood giggling in front of him, I watched closely as his demeanor changed; watching this transformation knots my stomach with fear but at the same time it is so damn sexy that it is intoxicating. My giggles subsided as his dark eyes captured my gaze and I saw that unmistakable wall rise. His normally warm, inviting chocolate brown eyes quickly darken to a cold, intent and penetrating stare. He discarded the list onto the desk with an audible thump and stood inches from me and I watched his posture change as his eyes had before. He folded his arms across his chest which emphasizes the broadness of his shoulders and the strength of his forearms. His smile had long since evaporated and his lips were now pressed into a hard line. His jaw set. The longer I focused on his changing body language, the smaller I felt. Mere minutes had stripped away the confidence, the independence, bubbly talkative mood, the carefree woman.......what remained was a small, scared little girl looking hesitantly up at her father, green eyes pleading for leniency as his conveyed resolve. 

"Go put your nose in the corner now." He instructed. I had to walk around him to go to the corner and though I had retracted my gaze, I could feel his eyes remain on me until I was in the corner. I stood facing the wall and nervously cracking my knuckles. I tried to calm my nerves by thinking of something else....anything else to distract me. I recalled a comment Susan had made in our earlier phone chat and I giggled. "Care to share with me what it is about this situation you find so damn hilarious, Natalie Lynn?" Professor spoke, literally inches from the back of my head. I froze. My mind went silent and honed in on only one thing....did he just curse? OMG! Yikes!

"I'm sorry Sir; I am just in a giggly mood." I whispered. "Yep, you certainly are little girl. I just can't seem to find the humor in this situation. Maybe I am missing something. I see 7 new offenses on this list in just the last few weeks since I last addressed your behavior. And two of them involve fighting. Point out which entry is so amusing to you, young lady." I stared at the corner of the wall and tried to order my giggles away before they got me into serious trouble. "Sir, may I show you something before we begin?" I asked. Professor sighed audibly and before he could even answer me, I jumped out of the corner and proudly displayed my newest ridiculous purchase to him. Bright purple and red toe socks with pretty green frogs blowing heart kisses all over them. :) He looked at my feet and then his eyes darted back up to mine as he slowly approached me.

My heart shot to my throat and my palms became moist, my mouth dry and my giggles were MIA as I watched Professor walk slowly toward me, his dark eyes flashing his irritation at my stall tactics. He stopped an inch from me. I had my back to the corner and in front of me stood the towering frame of my disciplinarian. When he purposely uses his body to invade my bubble of personal space it makes my heart race. I quickly regretted my decision to showcase my froggy socks and lowered my eyes away from his intense stare. I caught a glimpse of the bed behind him and saw that he had laid out our thick leather strap, his heavy paddle, another paddle and a cane. I began to nervously chew my bottom lip as my panic was rising.

His left hand encircled my right wrist and he pulled me along behind him as he walked to the couch across the room. He sat down and looked up at me as he spoke, "Get them down now." I quickly unbuttoned and unzipped my jeans and slid them down to mid thigh. He reached out again and pulled me down hard across his lap. His large left hand began raining down hard, heavy, stinging spanks covering my bottom and sit spots in rapid succession. The force took my breath away. 

SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK     "What it is that has you laughing is beyond me. There is NOTHING funny about the offenses on that list! NOTHING funny about me having to repeat several lessons to you. NOTHING funny about MY daughter FIGHTING! NONE of this is funny, little girl and you better lose the giggles or I'll whip them out of you before we even begin our lessons, do you understand me?" Professor scolded as I lay over his lap trying to wish away the sting in my bottom. "I'm sorry, Sir." I apologized. SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK SMACK    "I said, DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME LITTLE GIRL?" He barked. I closed my eyes and bit my lower lip; the sting in my bottom now rivaled by the sting in my heart as Professor raised his voice at me. I shook my head quickly and whimpered, "Yes Sir, I understand. I'm done giggling, I promise. I'm sorry." 

"Stand up." He ordered. I quickly rose to my feet, my jeans now entangled at my ankles. "Um, Sir....may I take my jeans off so I don't trip on them please?" I asked. "Yes, hurry up. Take the ridiculous socks off as well." He said. I hastily removed my jeans and socks, folded them and placed them on the dresser top before turning to again face the steely, grim, determined stare of my agitated disciplinarian. 

Professor pointed directly in front of him. I quickly approached and stood where he had pointed. "Kneel here, young lady." His tone was soft but all business. I knelt as he instructed and looked down at his feet, waiting for him to speak again. He was quiet for several minutes and in that time my mind went from racing a hundred miles a minute to complete silence. Kneeling is the ultimate position of submission and it completely quiets my mind and my heart. Nothing else registers, nothing else matters, nothing else exists in this moment but he and I. I am *his*....his to lead, his to guide, his to discipline, his to punish. Silently kneeling before him, soon to be punished, softly offering my submission and trusting him to take me in hand. There is no other position that makes me feel such powerful and overwhelming waves of submission. Professor rarely has me kneel but when he does, I love it. 

"Look at me, Natalie Lynn." His voice pulling me to the present. I hesitantly raised my head and my eyes found their way to his. He reached forward with his left hand and swept the hair from in front of my face and tucked it behind my ear as he spoke, "Any more laughter that needs addressed before we begin?" I blinked several times as I felt my eyes well with tears, "No Sir." I whispered up to him. He held my gaze a minute longer before speaking again, "Good, then it's time to begin our lessons. A few of your offenses are repeats which means I wasn't clear enough the last time. Two offenses in particular are really bad. 7 offenses in two weeks??? That's disappointing." He spoke softly, but his words hit their mark. I lowered my eyes at his last word and hung my head. I hate to disappoint him and he knows that. "This is serious Natalie and it's not going to be an easy spanking for you to take and I need you to understand that, clear?" He asked. I shook my head and managed to get out a, "yes Sir." 

His hand tucked under my chin and raised my face again. "Time to begin." He announced as his jaw clenched, his eyes set in a resolved stare and he reached out to again take my wrist. He pulled me to my feet and then just as quickly down again across his strong thighs. My hair blanketed the carpet below my face and I squirmed to find the most comfortable position possible, knowing I was going to be here for a while. Professor wrapped his right arm around my waist, pulling me closer to his body and tightening his grip; a silent reminder to me, to remain still and in position. 

"The first offense we are going to address is what you and Kristina did just 3 days after I last punished you. Why don't you refresh my memory and tell me what it is I am referring to little girl." His voice was firm and my stomach sank as I recalled the offense. I swallowed hard several times just trying to find my voice before finally speaking, "Kristina and I decided that since you had forbidden me from a bar fight with the two stupid girls that were irritating us, we decided to mask the confrontation as an MMA fight match since we both practice martial arts, because we thought that would be a way to get away with the fight, Sir." Just repeating it out loud to him made me realize how absolutely ignorant this idea sounded. My bottom tingled as I waited for the first of many swats.

Professor slowly ran his left hand across my tingling bottom. Up and down. Soft, gentle caressing that only made my nerve endings seem more sensitive but I laid still, relishing in his touch and preparing myself for the spanking I had earned myself this time. "Thankfully, I called and was able to stop you before you went through with this ignorant plan, so you didn't actually fight that time. But, if I hadn't caught you, you would have and for that you're being punished. You do NOT play semantics games with me young lady. I will not tolerate attempts to circumvent the intent of discipline out of my daughter; do you understand me?" He asked as he gave each sit spot a sharp smack.  SMACK!  SMACK!  

I inhaled sharply and answered immediately, "Yes Sir. I'm sorry." Professor opened his legs further apart, further elevating my bottom for punishment and leaving me helpless over his lap, my feet dangling above the floor. "Not as sorry as you're going to be, young lady." His response, knotting my stomach. Suddenly crisp, harsh swats from one of our solid oak bathbrushes began to rain down on my pantied bottom.

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"Oww. I'm so sorryyyy." I whimpered as I struggled to remain still. He rested the bathbrush on my lower back and slid his fingers under each leg of my boycut silk panties and yanked them to the center, quickly exposing my cheeks for his attention. "Not sorry yet, but let's see if I can change that, shall we." The tone of his voice was menacingly soft but notably firm. Professor raised the brush again and resumed paddling my now bare bottom very hard.

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I kicked my legs in vein as he paddled harder and began to lecture once more. "Not such a good idea now is it, young lady? Even considering fighting is enough to get my little girls bare bottom soundly spanked with her brush. Maybe you'll think about that the next time your bratty friends have a naughty idea. You know better Natalie Lynn, you knew better that night but tried to do it anyway, that disappoints me." His voice still soft as he scolded but his choice of wording couldn't have been more deliberate. I fought to stay still as a hot, salty tear began to cascade down my right cheek as I replayed that one word in my head over and over. Disappointed. :( 

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The stinging kisses of the brush subsided and I felt Professor's strong left hand firmly massaging my smoking cheeks. I sniffled and remained still, trying to swallow my whimpers and sobs. Still focused and honed in on that one word. That one awful word. That horrible, heart breaking word. Disappointed. I hate it.

"You then just a day after this offense got into a confrontation with a woman for criticizing your parenting because your son says ma'am and sir. You verbally lashed out in front of children at this woman. She didn't matter and her opinion didn't matter. It was unneeded confrontation and you know better, don't you young lady?" He asked. I sniffled and answered, "Yes Sir." Professor ran his hand softly across my aching bottom once more before again spanking me in earnest, connecting with my tender fleshy sit spots and upper thighs multiple times in a row before moving on to punish the next spot. I fought to remain still as I sobbed and he paddled my naughty bottom hard with that damn brush. 

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"Kneel in front of me again, young lady." He instructed as he helped me rise from his lap. Once on my feet, I again fell to my knees in front of my Dom. My moist, green eyes initially focusing on the floor but then slowly rising to meet his firm gaze. He remained quiet for a couple minutes, just holding my gaze with his dark brown eyes. I continued to blink back my tears at the thought of that damn word and its implications as I maintained eye contact with Professor. My hands rested flat against the tops of my bare thighs. Professor was saying nothing audibly, but there was continuous dialogue between he & I in those few moments as I knelt before him, hesitantly looking up at him.

"You knew better. I don't at all like knowing that you are willing to go along with such stupid ideas simply because your girlfriends think it is funny. You playing semantic games with me will not ever be tolerated. Do you value our relationship? Is this important to you? Us?" He asked. Just him asking the questions stung and though I knew he knew the answers to these questions, I also knew exactly why he was asking them. His point had been made. Crystal clear. "Yes Sir. You are very important to me." I whispered up to him. "You are proud of our disciplinary relationship. You brag to your friends about our connection and our dynamic. You choosing to play semantics games with me is not something you had ever tried to do before and it better not happen again. I wont tolerate it. It wastes my time and I have far better things to do than to spell out every possible offense under every conceivable circumstance. I told you on day one, I will not play games or tolerate my girl playing games with me; not when it comes to true discipline. Game playing undermines the work we have done and the relationship we have built. It weakens us. Don't you see that?" He asked quietly. "Yes Sir. I didn't think about any of this when I did it. I never meant to do anything that could hurt us. I'm so sorry." I whimpered as I dropped my head. Professor reached forward, catching me by my chin and raising my face again to his gaze. "I know you didn't consider any of this. That is my point. You have to consider all possible nuances. Never again....I will NOT tolerate it, Lynn....never again....have I made myself clear?" He asked, his dark eyes flashing his irritation and grim resolve. A tear escaped my left eye and caressed my cheek on its descent down my face as I answered quietly, "Crystal clear Sir." He studied my green eyes a minute more before sending me back to the corner. 

I stood quietly facing the corner of the wall as I listened to Professor moving things around behind me. "Sir, may I get a drink of my water?" I asked softly without moving from the corner. I heard him approach quickly and I bit my lip and held my breath. Professor's strong right arm wrapped securely around my abdomen and yanked backward, thrusting my bottom out as his left arm swung his heavy paddle down 6 fast and harsh times in a row.

CRACK! CRACK! CRACK! CRACK! CRACK! CRACK!

I threw my hand back instinctively to cover my bottom from the assault. He leaned in to me and whispered eerily soft beside my right ear, "You have 3 seconds to move that hand or I will do it for you and you will be a *very* sorry little girl." I quickly snatched my hand back to the top of my head as he rapidly applied 6 more burning licks, this time to my thighs.

CRACK! CRACK! CRACK! CRACK! CRACK! CRACK!

I sucked in air as if I were breathing it for the first time. My thighs burned so deeply. His heavy paddle is absolutely merciless. "NO! You may not get your water. And you had better very quickly recollect when you're allowed to speak to me during punishment, young lady or this paddle is going to blister you good before we even begin our next lesson. You know better!" He warned as he let me go and returned to rearranging furniture behind me as I hung my head in the corner, angry at myself for being so thoughtless. 

"Come here, Natalie Lynn." He barked. I slowly turned out of the corner and saw that he had moved the couch to the middle of the room. Professor reached his hand out to me and I gently placed my small hand into his open palm, smiling at the obvious difference in size of our hands. A visual reaffirmation of the dynamic we share. I may be a grown woman in my outward life, but I am still very much Professor's little girl and I *really* love that. :) 

Professor gently guided me around to the back of the couch. "Bend over the back, hands flat on the cushion. Do not move from that position, young lady." He instructed. "Yes Sir." I softly acquiesced as I moved to follow his direction. As I bent over the back of the couch to raise my bottom for further punishment, it left my feet dangling an inch or so from the floor. I remained still, in position, quietly waiting for my next much-deserved lesson. 

"Remember this, little girl?" Professor asked as he tapped his cane lightly on the couch back right next to me. I smiled softly as I recalled the one and only time he has caned me. It was in the spring, in his office on campus. A good girl spanking with an academic reminder to study for my MCATs and a fantasy finally fulfilled for a life-long spanko girl by her perfectly-strict and incredibly sweet Disciplinarian who enjoys making naughty girls fantasies an amazing reality. I looked up at Professor over my shoulder and my smile faded as I remembered the sting of the cane and how remarkably well Professor can apply cane strokes. "Yes Sir." I answered as I pouted up at him in an effort to inspire leniency. His jaw clenched and his eyes flashed that dark resolve in response to my pout and I quickly retracted my gaze. "Protecting Professor by not providing him with information he needs. This is an offense I have punished you before, Natalie Lynn. Since the last hairbrush accompanied lesson was not sufficient in teaching the lesson, you will now be caned for it, clear?" I nodded my head and offered a quick, "Yes Sir." before burying my face in the couch and waiting for that first searing hot white line to bite into my bared bottom. "After each stroke, you will repeat, 'I will not protect you by withholding information', understand young lady?" He instructed. "Yes Sir." I whimpered as I clenched my cheeks together in anticipation. 

THWACK!!!   "I will not protect you by withholding information from you, Sir." 

THWACK!!!   "I will not protect you by withholding information from you, Sir." 

THWACK!!!   "I will not protect you by withholding information from you, Sir." 

THWACK!!!   "I will not protect you by withholding information from you, Sir." 

THWACK!!!   "I will not protect you by withholding information from you, Sir." 

THWACK!!!   "I will not protect you by withholding information from you, Sir." 

Professor traced his fingertips along the half dozen perfectly spaced red welts he had just applied to my bottom. I flinched at the stinging sensation intensified by his gentle fingers but pressed my bottom out further to meet his touch. "No more protecting me, Natalie Lynn. Stay in position and remain quiet while I finish your caning." He instructed. "Yes Sir." I replied before burying my face again and gripping the cushion tightly in my balled up fists. 

THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! THWACK! 

Two dozen more hot white lines bit into my thighs and bottom before he laid the cane down. My bottom was on fire. Professor applies cane strokes perfectly. Even spacing, quick flicks of his wrist resulting in maximum sting and a very effective punishment with minimal force required. My breathing was rapid and I wiggled back and forth over the back of the couch, trying to wish away the sting. I could literally feel the white lines transform into angry raised, red welts. He paid close attention to my sit spots with the cane and it had the intended effect. I could feel the stretching skin ache with every movement. 

"You had a test to take that you were told about in June. You even set a reminder in your phone but you ignored that reminder alarm last month and only began studying 48 hours before the exam when thankfully a friend reminded you of the test, correct?" Professor questioned. I nodded and whimpered, "Yes Sir." He paced behind me as he lectured. "Ignoring reminders and alarms shows lack of self discipline and my daughter is not allowed to be undisciplined, is she?" He asked. "No Sir." I answered. "This could have impacted your career and that's not okay. You took incentive to set the alarm but then you chose to ignore it and procrastinate which ultimately made you completely forget it until the last minute when you had to stress and cram to prepare for the exam. I can not and will not allow you to be undisciplined when it comes to your career. I expect better than that and you expect better than that, you let us both down with this forgetfulness and procrastination. You chose to ignore the alarm reminders so now you'll receive my version of a reminder, and something tells me you wont be able to ignore or forget about this, young lady." He scolded. "What is this?" He asked. I turned my head to the side to look up at him. His face still grim and determined as he brought his hand out from behind his back. Dangling free from his left hand hung his well-worn leather belt, already folded over and ready to teach a lesson. My eyes shot up to his, pleadingly seeking mercy. 

His belt is likely the most effective implement for me because of the strong psychological impact. I searched his eyes, his face for a sign of softening but it wasn't there so I quickly resigned myself to my fate and hung my head as I answered, "Your belt, Sir." He leaned down to me, tucking the loose tendrils of hair behind my ear and speaking softly to me as the belt rested on the arm of the couch. "Do you think this reminder will be taken more seriously than the alarm on your phone?" He questioned. I sniffled and tried to hold back my impending sobs as I replied, "Yes Sir." He tugged my hair to tilt my face toward his, "You know better and you are better than this. I want my daughter to stay focused on important things like this so she excels. You are bright and your future is equally as bright but you have to maintain focus. No more procrastinating. My daughter will be self disciplined enough to prioritize. You are an amazing nurse and you will be an even better MD and PhD, but you have to focus to get there, when you don't focus then you will answer to me and I will whip the reminders into your bare bottom, little girl. Clear?" I again turned my head to look into his eyes as I answered, my bottom tingling in anticipation of the fiery bite of leather from his belt. "Yes Sir. Thank you." I smiled softly at him and another tear slowly slid down my cheek. Professor returned my smile and used his thumb to sweep away the tear from my cheek before returning to the demeanor of a disappointed father intent on teaching his errant daughter a good lesson. As he rose to his feet again, the jingle of the buckle on his belt made my heart race as I laid over the back of the couch, awaiting the first of what I knew would be many, many swats.

Professor stepped back and stood to my right side, his belt buckle securely wrapped in his left hand and the length of leather dangling at his side. I inhaled sharply as I caught a glimpse in my peripheral vision of his left arm rise before feeling the sting of the leather bite into my skin. The first swat caught me low on my thighs and provoked a squeak of discontent from my pursed lips. "Oww!"  

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My squeals and whimpering did nothing to sway his resolve. He was intent on making certain this reminder was taken to heart and I was equally intent on making sure this lesson wouldn't need repeating in the near future. I squeezed the cushion of the couch so tightly that my knuckles were white. Several times throughout the whipping my arm would instinctively rise on its way to cover & protect my poor, quickly blistering bottom but almost immediately I would drop it back to the cushion. After Professor and I's last punishment session, I know better than to put my hands back to protect my bottom; I also knew that I did deserve this whipping....in fact, I had asked for it myself because the ramifications for my carelessness could have seriously cost my a lot professionally and I need to prioritize so this doesn't happen again in medical school. 

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The belt rose and fell again over and over. Professor is very methodical in the way he whips me with his belt. He will apply a dozen or so swats quickly before pausing to walk to the other side of me and applying a dozen more. Back and forth.....all the way up my bottom and all the way down my thighs......stripe after searing stripe clearly conveying the displeasure of my Disciplinarian. 

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After a particularly harsh several dozen more, very rapidly applied, Professor dropped the belt over the arm of the couch. My breathing was as quick and hard as the last several dozen punishing swats. I sobbed softly into the couch cushions as Professor gently traced his fingertips over the criss-crossing striped welts. 

"No more procrastinating until you forget important things like this again, right?" He asked. I shook my head in agreement, unable to speak for fear my voice wouldn't be audible as I continued my quiet sobbing. "Come here." Professor instructed. I slowly rose from my bent over position draped across the back of the couch and stood on my shaky legs as I turned into Professor. His left hand tilted my head back by my chin so he was looking directly down into my swollen green eyes. "I want you to stand in the corner and think about the fight you engaged in this last week. That is our next lesson today and by far the most serious. We've spoken by phone and email about it but when we speak here today you had better hope you can convince me that you do understand why it was wrong and why you wont do it again. When I call you out of that corner, I am going to punish you for it and I punished you earlier this year for a physical fight, didn't I?" He asked as I looked up hesitantly into his dark brown eyes. "Yes Sir." I whispered up to him, another tear slowly making its way down my face. "I never wanted to have to repeat that lesson to you and because you've put me in the position that I must repeat it, this time it is going to be much more severe. You can NOT hit people, Natalie Lynn. What about that was not clear the last time we discussed this, little girl?" He scolded. I hung my head; I felt so ashamed. Professor quickly tucked his hand under my chin and raised my face back to his. "I'm so sorry." I sobbed. His eyes narrowed at me as he studied my face for a minute before speaking again.

"You were angry this week and I get that. You had a right to be angry. That woman hit you first and you wanted to retaliate. You weren't in any danger, security was right there and saw her strike you, you did not have to hit her back. You weren't defending yourself. You were getting even. You chose to lash out and hit her back because it felt good to retaliate, right?" He asked. I nodded my head and answered quietly, "Yes Sir." Professor sighed audibly, "Do you understand why you were wrong?" I knew he was right, I knew I was wrong and I knew that my choice to lash out could have had pretty steep consequences. Luckily for me, security supporting my version of events means that I wont have repercussions at work......BUT, I knew from the second I hit that idiot that there would be no way in hell that I'd escape consequences with Professor. "Yes Sir, I know I was wrong. I'm so sorry." I whimpered, looking up pleadingly into his eyes. I knew I had let him down and all I wanted was to be punished for it so we were 'okay' again and so I could be forgiven. 

"Go put your nose in that corner, young lady." He barked as he pointed to the corner. I slowly returned to the corner and placed my hands on my head like I am supposed to. I softly sobbed and prayed that time would crawl; I knew this was going to be a really, really intense punishment. It seemed like mere seconds before his voice echoed behind me again.

"Finish this statement for me; 'No Daughter...." He instructed as my heart sank. I took a deep breath and concentrated on a spot on the corner of the wall as I softly recited the warning. "No daughter of mine hits anyone else unless it is in defense of her or a weaker party and it is a last resort." I paused. "Or what?" He prompted. I fought to continue without my voice shaking too notably. "If you ever make me repeat this lesson to you young lady, we will have a very lengthy loop-strap accompanied discussion about how I feel about my little girl fighting." My voice trailed off just as I finished. "So now here we are, seven months later and you got into another fight. So either my first discussion with you wasn't intense enough or you thought I made an idle threat or perhaps you just didn't give a damn. Which is it, Natalie Lynn?" His tone was harsh, cold, detached and it stung my heart realizing I had made this tone necessary. I knew he hated to have to talk to me like this, to have to punish me this severely, to have to look at me so harshly.......but I also know that if I choose to do the wrong thing when I know what is right, I can very easily force Professor to put on this harsh, unrelenting, resolved hat. It is double-sided, this knowledge. When I have seriously screwed up and am having to face him, I *hate* that I have forced this and am so angry at myself for doing it. But when I am not in trouble, and simply thinking about us, it is almost a comforting feeling to know that he cares enough for me to be the 'bad guy' when I need/deserve it. 

"Turn and look at me now. Answer my damn question, don't you dare ignore me young lady!" He barked, his voice elevated. I jumped at the harshness so obvious in his tone. I slowly turned from the corner to face him, my eyes downcast......I did *not* want to see the look that surely would accompany this tone of voice. When I am in trouble, Professor is always serious and firm but his tone today reflected the kind of angry I have made him only once before this, and it truly breaks my heart. "I knew it wasn't an idle threat, you don't threaten me, only make promises Sir. And I promise I did take the first lesson seriously. And I swear, it isn't that I don't give a damn. I just got angry, really angry and I know that doesn't justify my choice. I know I was wrong....really wrong. Sir, please just whip me, I know I deserve it, please. I don't have any answers or excuses. I was bad...I knew better....I was wrong and I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Sir." 

"Look at me." He instructed. I took a deep breath and slowly raised my eyes to lock with his. "I know you're sorry. You want me to just shut up and punish you.....because that would be easy. Am I right?" He asked. I nodded my head and fought not to look away from him. His jaw was clenched, his lips a hard line, his arms folded across his broad chest.....the picture perfect portrait of an angry father glaring at his errant daughter. I searched his eyes for leniency, for any small sign of softening.....it simply was not there.....I had pushed too far this time and he was truly mad at me. 

"I give you my word that this punishment will be anything but easy, young lady. I am going to take my time and make damn sure that you will never forget this lesson. You will not ever want to make me repeat this lesson to you again. Do you have anything else to say before you get into position?" He asked. "I'm so sorry Sir." I mumbled as my eyes welled with fresh tears. "You have not ever let me down like this before. My little girl doesn't fight. My daughter knows better. You CHOSE to ignore what you knew was the right thing to do.....My little girl CHOSE to defy me and disobey my rules." He barked, raising his voice to emphasize certain words. I felt so ashamed of myself and so very small. I hung my head again and he immediately snapped at me, "LOOK AT ME." My body jumped again and I raised my face to meet his as a tear rolled down my cheek. "I am so incredibly disappointed in you, Natalie Lynn." His tone, the look on his face and his choice of wording......it was quite simply, heartbreaking. My tears began to flow freely down my cheeks and I tried one last time to find some small hint of softening....something.....anything at all.....but I still saw nothing but steely & grim resolve. I again dropped my eyes, looking at him was unbearable knowing I had put that look on his face. Professor's left hand encircled my wrist and he firmly yanked me around the couch and thrust me forward once again bending me over the back, with my hands and face to the cushion, feet dangling inches from the floor, sore bottom perfectly presented for further chastisement. 

"MY DAUGHTER does NOT fight!" He snapped as he quickly brought down his heavy paddle across my bottom with a loud CRACK! I threw my head back, gasping for air at the sheer force he put behind the swat. This is by far the thickest and heaviest paddle in our collection and even the slightest flick of his wrist applies a stinging swat; no flicking of the wrist today, he was swinging the paddle down with force. Professor has used this paddle to punish me many times, typically in very slow and deliberate swats, spaced evenly apart by several seconds. Being paddled in that manner allows the swat to sink in, me to brace for the next and though it is painful, the time allows for the burning sting to build up over time. Today, Professor paddled me with this large paddle like he does our brushes......hard, fast, unforgiving swats applied one right after the next.....no break at all between swats. He has *never* paddled me like this with his heavy paddle. I have a very high tolerance to pain but being paddled with this heavy paddle so rapidly very, VERY quickly pushed me to my limit and then far beyond as he continued to teach me the lesson. 

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"Owww....pleassseee" I cried out. The pain in my bottom was unforgivingly intense. I held the cushions tight and just cried. I laid completely limp over the back of the couch, offering no resistance, no kicking, no struggling to get away. I knew I deserved this spanking and I just hoped my submission would show Professor that I truly was sorry. The paddle fell to the couch, directly in front of my face. As I looked at it, I felt a harsh bite in my thighs......it was our rubber looped strap.....he warned me in March that if I fought again, he would strap me with this awful thing and he was intent on keeping that promise. Professor whipped me so hard with that strap that I squealed a couple times as the rubber wrapped around my thigh and bit into my hip. My sit spots seemed to be his focus with this strap as he whipped me fast and hard.

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After several dozen searing swats, the whipping subsided. I was crying openly by this point, but remaining in perfect position, presenting my bottom for whatever amount of punishment he felt I deserved. I felt so horrible for how much I'd let him down that he could have whipped me all day and it wouldn't have been enough. I saw Professor reach again for the heavy paddle and I cried out to him, "Pleassee not that pleasseee Sirrr. I'm sorryyyy." I felt his hand on the small of my back, gently rubbing in circles as he spoke to me again, his tone not nearly as rigid as it had been but still very firm and all business. "Don't you ever make me have to punish you like this again, young lady." I knew he was going to paddle me again with that heavy paddle now, but his touch and his words almost comforted me and calmed my apprehension. I was determined to accept the duration of my punishment and I knew I deserved it.

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Again the heavy paddle came down with force and one swat immediately after another. My internal panic again rising with the pain in my bottom......there is very little that can physically challenge me in a spanking, but Professor paddling me like this with this particular paddle had me to my limits in less than a dozen quick swats and he certainly didn't stop at a dozen. Typically by this late point in a punishment session, I am lost in subspace and my bottom feels invincible.....not today, the intensity of this paddling had me very much in the present and focused on the pure pain of my punishment. Professor held his right hand firmly to my back to keep me in position as he applied the last several dozen swats directly to my thighs with just as much force and speed as the rest of the paddling had been.

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I was completely limp across the back of the couch, sobbing incoherently my apologies into the cushion. My skin felt so tight with any and every tiny little movement. My bottom was on fire but I had remained in position regardless of the intensity. My heart still ached and as I laid there crying, I felt almost broken. I was wrong and I had been punished.....but it was not over yet, not for me. Professor took my wrist in his hand and slowly escorted me back to the corner. I stood there crying softly and reflecting through what choices I should've and will in the future make differently. I could feel Professor's eyes on me as I stood sobbing in the corner and I knew it probably broke his heart as much as it had mine that he had to be so harsh with me. The punishment truly sucked but knowing he loves me enough to do it, was incredibly touching. 

"Come here, in front of me, Natalie Lynn." His voice was firm but no longer harsh. I turned from the corner and walked very slowly over to where he was sitting. Every step I took stretched the skin on my bottom and legs and it pulled so awfully tight that I winced with each movement. I stopped directly in front of Professor and knelt before him, my hands flat against the tops of my thighs, my puffy moist eyes locked on the floor as I softly sobbed at his feet. He reached forward and gently lifted my face and as my eyes met with his, I cried harder. "This is the last time we'll repeat this lesson, isn't it?" He asked softly. Tears cascaded down my cheeks as I nodded my head and whispered up to him, "This is the last time, I promise Sir. I'm so very sorry for disappointing you, Sir. I'm just so sorry." I told Professor from the day I first met him that I would never make him a promise that I couldn't keep, and I was now ready to promise him that I wouldn't again fight with anyone unless it was necessary defense. That was a HUGE step for me. I've been a fighter much of my life but I now understand that it really is wrong and can't be considered an option for my short temper any longer. 

Professor studied my face for a moment before his softened and he reached for me, pulling me into his chest and holding me tightly to him as I cried onto his chest and apologized again. He stroked my long, red hair and 'shhhshhd' me as I held tightly to him. I lingered in his embrace for a minute longer before he held me at arms length, wiping the tears from my eyes as he said, "We are fine. Your behavior was disappointing....*not* you. You may test my patience, make me repeat myself, push your boundaries and give me headaches with your naughtiness but you make me so proud of you Natalie Lynn and I'm very glad that you're my daughter. You might be a brat but you're MY brat and I love having you as my little girl." He smiled and I jumped back into his arms for another hug. His words, his tone, his smile and his touch told me that we were indeed perfectly fine. He had forgiven me and I was his good little girl again.....and that is an amazing feeling.