Okay so because my Professor and I don't live super close to one another, and because we both have careers and families.......it is not usually possible for me to be spanked immediately after I do something to warrant it. So I have to keep a punishment list on google docs and list any entries Professor tells me to for punishment at a later date. This completely sucks in that I have to wait and the longer I wait the more I think and the more I think the more nervous I get. It's a never-ending cycle and it sooooo sucks.
So anyway, after my second to last session with Professor, I made it almost an entire month without getting even one single entry on that darn list. Which is pretty freaking amazing for me because when Professor first adopted me, I was getting at least one a day!
So Professor and I had our last session on June 22nd and afterward I had intended to be a good girl. Really, I swear. I planned to be really good......and I planned that our next session would be play instead of punishment......and I planned to beat my one month of good girl record......and then my plans all went to hell. I somehow ended up collecting 8 darn entries to my punishment list in just a week after my last session. Ughhhh.
In the past when I have gotten in trouble so quickly after a session Professor will typically say something like "I guess I didn't spank you hard enough the last time"........he hasn't said that YET this time, so Professor if you're reading this.......I promise you DID spank me hard enough. Here's my bigger concern.......if you have read my blog much then you'll see my Disciplinarian does not care to repeat himself and unfortunately for my bottom, I am a slow learner.....okay I am a smart girl so perhaps I just have selective hearing? Ughhh. See all of my latest offenses are going to be repeat offenses......which sucks because he only seems to become more determined the more I make him repeat himself to me. It isn't that I don't know or forgot that I am not allowed to use the 'F' word......I just didn't seem to care and fell right back to it when I was pissed off......at my phone none the less when the person I thought could NOT hear me on the other end was PROFESSOR! Stupid right? Yeah. Obviously he could in fact hear me and he was not pleased.....nor did he care that I was pissed off......and he didn't seem to care for my blaming my phone either. That didn't surprise me; he has not ever allowed me to make excuses for my behavior.
So none of my offenses were super horrible by any means, they were relatively small-ish if you ask me......but it is Professor's opinion that matters and I think each of these offenses being repeat lessons will raise the severity level of the otherwise small-ish offenses. Ughhh. Okay well at least one of the offenses was not what I would consider 'small-ish'......missing medication is a bit more serious so that one I probably expect to be a big deal. But the other nonsense.....ughhhhh..... I swear my freaking mouth gets me into more trouble than anything else. Oh then as if the swearing at my phone when he could hear it wasn't bad enough, then I signed an email with that lovely little F word my Professor adores so much. Stupid stupid stupid.
Okay so 1 huge-ish issue and a half dozen or more small-ish but repeat offense issues........yeah, this is going to probably suck a lot. I just don't seem to get why I was so well behaved for so long after my second to last session but after this last one I just started misbehaving right away again. *sighs*
I don't know how or why you missed your meds, but that has sometimes been a problem for me, especially for the one I take first thing in the morning. It takes so little time to swallow a pill, that I couldn't remember sometimes whether I'd taken it or not- I am NOT a morning person. So, I put the pills in a days-of-the-week container and write myself notes on a nearby calendar, and now I rarely miss one. Maybe something like that would help you.
ReplyDeleteIt's hard to break habits. It has been hard for me to control swearing, too. Embarrassing yourself can help. Here's what I did. I was making an appointment for the colonoscopy my doctor ordered. The nice man I was talking to on the phone, told me about the prep. I sighed and said that I'd just look at it as a weight loss technique. He then told me that some people do abuse the drugs to lose weight, adding that doing so was ridiculous. What popped out of my mouth? "No, it's f***ing stupid!" Now, I'm sure that as a medical professional you will agree with my characterization, but saying so was just rude. Fortunately, he just laughed, but I was still embarrassed.
Oh girl i feel ya on the cursing issue. I actually do try bc i know how much my dom hates it but its soooo hard. I just got told last night that i have to write 333 lines (i hate odd numbers and hes just cruel lol) for cursing. Maybe you guys could try lines or things like that for when you cant meet up right away?
ReplyDeleteSusan.....I have definitely heard worse. I set a reminder on my cell phone but somehow ignored it. Something so seemingly small can cause such huge issues.....ughhh.
ReplyDeletePlayful.....zip your lips! Don't be giving this darling sadist of mine any ideas. He seems to come up with ideas all on his own.....creative thing that he is.
Professor....if you read playful's suggestions.....use them for your students, not me. :) I don't care to write lines and/or essays so you'd likely get a blank sheet of paper turned in from me. :)